Faith, in the midst of fear.

I came across this verse and quickly was thankful for the events which unfolded Sunday evening, as well as reminded of a similar event that took place over 20 years ago. I selected this image of a road with this verse to symbolize and give an illustration to a story I am about to share.

Let’s start with Sunday then we will travel even farther back in time. This past Sunday was amazing, we slept in, still went to church, the start of the service with the praise and worship songs were moving, we had a fundraiser I was assisting in, and we listened to the sermon. Everything ran smoothly. We sold everything for our fundraiser. We looked forward to getting one step closer towards our goal.

After church was an evening spent at a family birthday gathering where my children got to meet some of their cousins. A blessed day over all despite some personal reservations. I was happy with the outcome and blessings of the day and was extremely thankful. Your probably wondering where does fear strike in all of this. As my family and I were getting ready to leave, we turn on our car and this message pops up:

We were like oh my God tomorrows school, we have work, what is going on???

We had just shared a story an hour prior about the engine we had to replace for our German car. So I go on the website / blog for the cars manufacturer to see if there’s anything we need / can do while we get a hold of the mechanic. I Read the blogs and though my face did not show my anxiety, had you taken my pulse you would’ve felt it. I casually go over to my spouse and share what I have researched. Our brother in law who is into cars comes by to take a look, gives a few suggestions and then poof, the message goes away. We decided let’s carefully drive home to get the kids to bed and see about getting the car over to the mechanic, we have an upcoming road trip and we don’t need any glitches. So we begin our commute.

As we begin driving along kings highway in Brooklyn NY our car jerked then suddenly our speedometer went from 25mph to 5mph. We couldn’t shift gears, nothing worked. This road we take is usually packed. By the grace of God and only God that evening it was empty. We crawled to a side road and were unable to move. The way the car jerked we all got scared, but in the midst of that I knew I needed to keep calm for my kids who asked “mommy are we going to die?” They understood the potential danger, they understood at any given moment a car could have clipped us.

As I reassured them we were fine I kept asking God please just lead us to safety, protect my family. Once we called AAA to assist in getting a flatbed over so we can lug our car to the mechanic, I reached out to my mom let her know what happened. Let her know we were fine. The kids and I walked home in that late hour while my husband waited for AAA. I packed our bags, and went by my mothers.

God is the only reason I know we were safe. God is the only reason I know we were not clipped by another vehicle traveling 45mph or more. God is the only reason we got home safely from where we got stuck .

Despite my dread & my fear I kept faith in not only knowing that God would get us to our destination safely but that he would resolve this for us.

Now let’s travel back to over 20 years ago.

This story that I shared is not the first scary vehicular incident I have experienced.

While all this was happening I had a flashback to 1996. I remember sitting in the back seat of our family Oldsmobile. I remember my siblings sitting next to me. My mom driving across the Brooklyn Bridge headed towards Manhattan so we can pick up my dad who was working late. As kids we used to play games, sing along, talk, or sometimes enjoy the view of our iconic NYC Skyline. Then I hear my mom calmly say, guys make sure your seatbelts are secure, because I don’t know what’s going on. All she kept saying was Jesus take the wheel.

Her brakes failed her while crossing the bridge, the car jerked and her speed was reducing on its own. She couldn’t shift any gears, everything was locked somehow. I remember being in the back seat holding on to my siblings as I realized we were swerving between cars from one lane to another. My mom looked focused, despite her fears and desperation seeing her 4 kids in the rear view mirror filled with fear. All she kept saying was Jesus take the wheel, get my kids out of here safely. Jesus take the wheel.

I don’t know how many of you have been on the Brooklyn Bridge pre 9/11. But Prior to 9/11 the exit that passes by one police plaza which is currently closed did like this whole wrap around infinity like loop that brings you to the other side of city’ hall park. My mom knew if she would’ve gone straight, we probably would’ve crashed in to pedestrians trying to walk across the bridge, if we would’ve taken the far exit we would’ve been setting up to a collision with those trying to get on the bridge towards the entrance on the other side. So she navigated towards the infinite loop as I called it, knowing many drivers didn’t opt to that exit back then, unless they were heading south in the city. As we completed the loop and swerved between cars, the Oldsmobile finally stopped in front of city hall park and didn’t move. Not one scratch on the vehicle, not one scratch on either of us, not one scratch on any pedestrian. God was good. He saved us, he saved those around us.

Jesus literally took the wheel. Jesus literally guided us with strength with our faith in him. He guides us to safety.

Both incidents were quite an adventure.

Both incidents were quite scary.

Both incidents tested our faith.

Both incidents despite our concerns we took comfort in God.

Both incidents we came out unscathed.

Both incidents Jesus took the wheel.

Both incidents God immediately answered our prayers.

I told my mom that I had experienced a flashback to that evening. My younger brother who was about 8 at the time said he remembers that night, it was one of the most scariest he ever experienced.

I think as a mom this was scarier than my first time. Yet I have an even more newfound respect for my mom experiencing what I did, knowing full well what she must’ve been going through that evening 20+ years ago.

God has given me strength beyond words could ever describe. God has helped us run like a dear. God has lead us to safety. He is the music director to my stringed instruments. I will follow God’s lead, follow his guidance, because time and time again God has said “I got you son” “I got you my daughter” “I got your back”. We just need to listen, trust and always keep faith.

Father God I thank you for your love, mercy and forgiveness which endures forever.  God I thank you for your protection and guidance.  Father I thank you for helping us run like a dear, I thank you for leading us to safety.  You are the music director and I am your stringed instrument.  Thank you for always taking the wheel, for always guiding us to the right path, for always keeping us out of harms way, for always keeping innocent bystanders out of harms way as well. Amen

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