Proverbs 24:16 The righteous may fall seven times but still get up, but the wicked will stumble into trouble
A few weeks ago I saw two posts from TD James and I was just moved. Both posts correlate with one another. Both posts have a cause and effect factor. Both post reflects agents of change within oneself.
One of the posts were about failure. The other was about change agents.
We have all been in a place where we have felt like complete failures. No matter what we do, no matter what we say, no matter what we just keep failing.
Right now I feel like I’m soaring everywhere but in my own home. I feel like I am free falling to my inevitable kaput.
Have you ever seen looney tunes?
I’m wild E coyote chasing after the road runner. I follow the road runner, thinking that I am going to get my prize, then low and behold I was so blind sighted by the prize that I didn’t pay attention to my surroundings. I didn’t realize I had stepped over the cliff, the road, the gravel, the sand, the desert are no longer beneath my feet.
I can see the road runner up ahead. I can hear it say “beep, beep” as he sets off into the sunset. Now I realize my desperation and my despair. I look below I see nothing, I look around and see nothing. I’m stories high and now I am free falling.
We’ve all been there.
I am currently there today.
I am spiraling down free falling at home.
Where did I go wrong?
We tend to have a bad habit in the midst of these trials to not seek God for guidance. Luckily for me I know better, based on my experiences, to know to seek and praise him in the good times as well as the bad times. Today I seek refuge in God to give me guidance, words or whatever he has for me to fix this situation.
Back to TD Jakes posts.
3 ways to fail at everything in life:
1- complain about everything
2- blame others for your problems.
3- never be grateful
Based on his points here is how I failed:
I complained about my situation at home:
I blamed everyone for my problem.
My six year old has become very sassy. He has become very lazy, he suddenly has become a smart mouth. He has become very disrespectful as of late. Instead of getting to the root of the problem I have reprimanded him. As a mother I feel his failures are my failures. I complained about our circumstance and fully blamed him. Whereas my lack of providing the guidance needed is also the problem. I too am to blame.
We all go through situations where our children do something and we react. Sometimes the built up stress of our every day lives are channeled at the wrong time. I need to assess myself as well as my child so we can stop blaming others. Accept responsibilities for our faults and move onward. Parenting and our walk in Christ are always evolving and something we learn from with each day, each event, each second.
The second post from TD Jakes said the following:
5 characteristics of change agents
1- clear vision
2- patient yet persistent
3-ask tough questions
4-knowledgeable & leads by example
5- strong relationships built on trust.
This is where I am trying to get to with my problem at home.
I need to see the bigger picture. See clearer. I cannot do this if I am raging. I need to be patient but get to the root of the problem, the interior problem within me and the interior problem with my child. Patience will be needed since that may take a little bit longer. I do need to ask the tough questions. To myself and my child. I will need to lead by my example and show him I too am learning, i too make mistakes but this is how we fix, learn and grow from these mistakes. I need to ensure that my relationship stays strong. Right now is the time to fix it before it gets out of hand.
Right now I need to focus on the bigger picture.
Right now the bigger picture is not loosing my son, getting him to respect and to have reverence.
Right now the bigger picture is also to work within myself and battle this battle I am dealing with so that I may not lose who I am.
Father God I thank you for all that you have given me. I thank you for your guidance. I thank God for allowing me to utilize writing as a self reflection as well as to reassess my actions. God this tool could also be used for others who may have similar yet different experiences. Though I felt this Morning that the road was pulled from under my feet, I know it was your guidance that made me realize what steps I need to take to fix this. Lord I pray for the reader reading this who has a similar situation. I ask you to give them the knowledge and wisdom to assess, reflect, distress and approach their circumstances in a christian like way. Father I ask for forgiveness for my actions, I also ask for forgiveness for my child. Father please guide us both when I approach him on this manner. Father guide the reader reading this, as they approach the battles they are facing. May we be reverent in your cause. May you provide words and comfort. Amen.